I have a real problem with the whole gay marriage issue. Not that I don’t have an opinion on the issue. I do. My opinion is that it is a non-issue. I have a much bigger problem with the way this non-issue is being dealt with.

One the one side, you have those who are in favor of gay marriage. They attempt to make it into some sort of fundamental human rights issue. It is not. In fact, until about 100 years ago, the government did not even get involved with marriages at all. If you wanted to get married, you went to your church, or you just pledged your love and decided to be married (common law marriage). The government only got involved in marriage because (1) they were racist and wanted to ban interracial marriage (please see the South, 1860-1920), or (2) they needed to govern divorces and protect the interests of females who could not make a living because society was so sexist (please see America, pre 1970). No, this is not about fundamental rights. It is about gays and their supporters wanting the government and society to endorse, condone, accept, and embrace their behavior. Why do you need anyone to justify your actions? If you are that comfortable with what you do, who cares if anyone else thinks it’s “evil” or “sinful”? The argument about just wanting the same “benefits” as everyone else doesn’t fly either. What benefits are we talking about exactly? Insurance?? Sorry, the government has nothing to do with a private insurance company’s policies. Further, I’ve been married for eleven years and I’m still trying to figure out exactly what benefits I have that are being denied to a gay couple. It’s all about the way society looks at them. Sorry, folks. Legalizing gay marriage isn’t ever going to make Pat Robertson think it’s okay. But it’s Pat Robertson, so what do you care, really?

On the other side, you have those who want to pass laws against gay marriage, including Constitutional Amendments banning the practice. Their rationale is that gay marriage hurts society and is a threat to tradition intergender marriage, and will ultimately harm the family. Well, of course we should ban everything that hurts the family, right? Ok, if that’s your goal, fine. Where’s your law to ban divorce? Where’s your petition for a constitutional amendment banning premarital cohabitation??? Anyone with a brain must admit that DIVORCE and PREMARITAL COHABITATION are the two biggest threats to marriage and family, even more so than gay marriage. If your goal is to protect marriage and family, then why are you concentrating on banning something that is AT LEAST third on the list of major threats to marriage and family? The answer, of course, is that those seeking a ban on gay marriage are not truly motivated by a belief that gay marriage will harm the family. They just hate gays, or hate their behavior, and want to do everything they can to discourage a gay lifestyle.

Look, marriage is what it is. It is what it has always been. Both sides should just deal with it, be tolerant of the other side’s view, and leave the government and the law out of the bedroom.