Top Five Reasons Kobe will NEVER be as good as Jordan, 6/20/08

1. Jordan has a bigger will to win.
2. Jordan played better defense.
3. Jordan never went 0 for 8 from three point land over the last three quarters of a Finals elimination game.
4. Finals scoreboard: Jordan, 6-0. Kobe, 3-2.
5. Jordan: not a rapist.

Top Five Reasons I have Not Blogged For Over a Year, 5/23/08

1. I am lazy
2. I adopted a second child
3. I got a new job
4. Did I mention how lazy I am?
5. Mostly the laziness

Top Five Finger Foods (May 4, 2007)

1. Buffalo Wings
2. Mozerella Sticks
3. Onion Rings
4. Mini Corn Dogs
5. Chili Cheese Fries

Top Five Dog Breeds (May 3, 2007)

1. Border Collie (smarter than most people)
2. English Bulldog (too expensive, but just COOL)
3. Labrador Retreiver (just a good-tempered dog)
4. German Shepherd (best home protection available)
5. Great Dane (huge but so sweet)

Top Five Kids’ Cereal (May 2, 2007)

1. Fruity Pebbles
2. Fruit Loops
3. Lucky Charms
4. Cocoa Pebbles
5. Honey Comb

Top Five Draft Busts (May 1, 2007)

1. Ryan Leaf, Chargers
2. Ki-Jana Carter, Bengals
3. Heath Shuler, Redskins
4. Tony Mandarich, Packers
5. Steve Emtman, Colts

Top Five 80s Albums (April 27, 2007)

1. Appetite for Destruction, Guns ‘N’ Roses
2. The Joshua Tree, U2
3. 1984, Van Halen
4. Paul’s Boutique, The Beastie Boys
5. Thriller, Michael Jackson

Top Five 80s Games (April 26, 2007)

1. Trivial Pursuit
2. Stop Thief
3. Dark Tower
4. Mr. Game Show
5. Electronic Battleship (kept my brother from the strategy of moving his ships every time I found one!)

Top Five John Hughes Movies (April 25, 2007)

1. The Breakfast Club
2. Sixteen Candles
3. Weird Science
4. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
5. National Lampoon’s Vacation

Top Five 80s Television Comedies (April 24, 2007)

1. The Tracey Ullman Show (Fox)
2. Cheers (NBC)
3. Sledge Hammer! (ABC)
4. Married With Children (Fox)
5. Night Court (NBC)

Top Five 80s Fashions (April 23, 2007)

1. The Mullet (don’t laugh, even studs like Bono sported one)
2. The Jean Jacket (full with “Iron Maiden” patches)
3. The Members Only Jacket (You’re not a member? Get the hell out of my decade!)
4. Big Ass Bangs
5. Pegged Jeans and High Top Jazz Vans (Skater or poseur???)

Top Five Supporting Characters In Comedies (April 20, 2007)

1. Long Duck Dong, Sixteen Candles
2. Shooter McGavin, Happy Gilmore
3. Bill Lumbergh, Office Space
4. Chet Donnelly, Weird Science
5. Azamat Bagatov, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

Top Five Punk Rock Albums (April 19, 2007)

1. London Calling by the Clash
2. Never mind the bollocks here’s the Sex Pistols by the Sex Pistols
3. Leave Home by the Ramones
4. Raw Power by Iggy Pop and the Stooges
5. Dookie by Green Day

Top Five TV Comedies (April 18, 2007)

1. Seinfeld
2. Arrested Development
3. The Simpsons
4. Curb Your Enthusiasm
5. The Office

Top Five Rock and Roll Lead Singers (April 17, 2007)
(Criteria: judged for work within a band, not solo projects)

1. Freddy Mercury (Queen)
2. David Lee Roth (Van Halen)
3. Bono (U2)
4. Steven Tyler (Aerosmith)
5. Robert Plant (Led Zeppelin)

Top Five Euphemisms For Pooping (April 13, 2007)

1. “I’m going to send the Browns to the Super Bowl.”
2. “I’m going to log out.”
3. “I’m going to squeeze a coily.”
4. “I’m going to pinch a loaf.”
5. “I’m going to clip a duke.”

Top Five Super Bowl Plays (April 12, 2007)

1. John Riggins 43 yard touchdown run on fourth and one, SB XVII
2. Lynn Swann’s acrobatic catch, SB X
3. Max McGee’s one-handed catch, SB I
4. Joe Montana’s touchdown pass to John Taylor, SB XXIII
5. John Elway’s helicopter run, SB XXXII